Father's Day Reflections
Father’s Day has been a somewhat bittersweet for me this year. There’s a nostalgic sentiment in reflecting on the relationship my father and I have developed over the past 24 years, especially since the last two years we’ve spent hundreds of miles apart. The road we’ve traveled has been marked with laughter and joy, tragedy and tears, but in looking back on all the moments, I know that a lot of the credit for my successes and for the woman I’ve become I owe to my daddy. A girl’s relationship with her father really shapes the heart of a woman and can leave an impression so deep it determines her life perspective.
My daddy taught me a great number of things over the years, all of which have made me all the more wise, conscious, and compassionate. He taught me that love is a choice, not a feeling, and that there are infinite ways to express it. I learned that forgiveness, too, is a choice, but there’s but one way to express it. As painful as it was for years, he taught me the game of golf, and it ultimately has become my favorite past time with him. Also for years I watched him work himself nearly to death in the rolling mill of a steel company. He missed lots of ball games, award ceremonies, debate tournaments and the like, but as an adult I can see that he was only loving me with his hard work. He also patiently poured over physics and calculus homework with me, and shot hoops with me from time to time (he was a tough opponent), and if I begged enough, he rubbed my feet while we watched ballgames on the couch. He also taught me the definition of frugality - the hard way. I learned that air conditioner in a used car during the Texas summer months was actually a luxury and a set of golf clubs is a necessity. I learned from him that it’s not always appropriate to cry, but it’s okay to shed tears at your father’s grave on the anniversary of his death or at your daughter’s baptismal ceremony. Giving each other little nicknames is a way of saying “I love you,” and bear hugs say “I need you.”
I’ll never forget one evening, not long after I had moved in with him after living with Mom for seven years, he took me out on the back patio and gave me a talk that changed my life entirely. I think I was about 12 years old. The conversation topic will always remain between the two of us, but his words resonated with me so much that no life hardship has kept me from happiness since (and there have been a great many hardships). I truly think he is the wisest person I’ve ever known.
I’ve had my share of heartaches and heartbreaks, but when I look at the man my dad is, I have full confidence that truly good men do exist - that they live to love, and love unconditionally. Many children don’t have the chance at nurturing a relationship with their fathers, so I know I am blessed. When I think of my father, the only words to express my adoration is “my cup runneth over.” He is wise, patient, kind, understanding, extremely clever, honest and respectful. He is slow to anger and quick to forgive. He has a quiet confidence and a steady, loving hand. I’d trust him with my life, and I’d certainly give mine for his. Never has a daughter loved her father like I love my daddy. He is my hero.
5 months ago
